Waiting...Blows....

Waiting sucks....

Alot....

Especially when you are waiting for an event and you don't even know how it is going to go. It's one thing to wait for a concert. You know how that will happen. You wait, and wait and wait. And then the lights go down and you CHEER and enjoy the rest of the evening. Yet, waiting for the outcome of something is much more difficult. I am currently sitting on my rump waiting. For my answer from Denver Seminary.

It's hard not to let your mind wonder with "would ofs" or "what ifs". "Did I use grammer on all my essays?" "Did I mention this on my application?" "What if they know I don't always wash my hands after going to the bathroom?" It is enough to drive the normal person insane.

While waiting, I have noticed that people will do different things to occupy their time, or to get their mind off things. Some read magazines, others do crafts. I do something that is totally out of my character. I clean. Everything. Dishes counters, anything with dirt gets clean or thrown away. It feels very productive and as though I am being constructive with my time. And makes me feel better about myself...

The other thing I will do is will come up with really bad ideas. This is also used as a distraction tool. It usually starts with internet shopping, "What can I buy that I can't afford?" Perfect. Then this will escalate into, "What are other really bad ideas I can look into that are both destructive for me, my wallet and my marriage?" I came up with tons!! Like, buying a new wardrobe, or a $1500 computer, or I know!! I'll go to Bonnaroo!! Cause all of those are really constructive.

Essentially when I am in waiting I am like a person on meth picking at their scabs. It seems like a good idea. But in the end I am no better off then I was.

Denver Seminary says that I should know by my birthday. Which is very soon. And also sets up for a bad birthday. We'll see...

I have decided though to add hippie music festival to the list.